Sh*t My Dad Says

Twenty-eight-year-old Justin Halpern found himself living at home with his seventy-three-year-old father after his longtime girlfriend broke up with him. Justin started recording all the absurd things his father said to him when he went back home. Sam Halpern, who he describes as "like Socrates, but angrier, and with worse hair," is a man of few words. Beyond your league? Let ladies figure out why they aren't going to screw you, son. Avoid doing it for them.

Do people in your age group know how to style their hair? It seems as if two squirrels got up on their heads and began having sex."

Being a liar is the worst thing you can be... Alright, so being a Nazi is undoubtedly the worst thing you can be, but lying comes in second. One Nazi, two liars."

Over a million people now follow Mr. Halpern's thought-provoking tweets, and his son has crafted a poignant, hilarious, and witty coming-of-age story around the finest of his quotations in this book. Sh*t My Dad Says is an all-American tale that takes place in Denny's, on the Little League field, during agonizing family road trips, and, most often, in the Halperns' kitchen over bowls of Grape-Nuts. It's a wild, funny, and accurate portrayal of a father-son relationship from a significant new comic voice.